Quest for the Maillot Jaune

That's right. It's Tour Time baby! The Tour de France starts on Saturday with the Prologue which is a 12 mile individual time trial. Basically all the leaders take off over the last 20 spots or so at two minute intervals. It's fast and exciting. But since many people don't quite understand the race itself, I'm going to give you a little help. First of this site has everything you could possibly need to know. The best feature they have is you can look at a day by day breakdown of each stage in which they show you course route and tell you what the race should be like that day.

Basically stages 2-8 will be boring. They are long flat stages that come down to a sprint finish and no one really gets a lead on the field. The only thing of note here is that the leaders have to avoid getting in huge crash during these days. A crash early in the race could lead to a breakaway or you can injured like Tyler Hamilton a few years ago who broke his collarbone on the first stage and had to race for the next three weeks with basically one hand holding on to the bike. Stage 9 on 7/10 is the first real day in the mountains. They hit the Alps from Stage 9 through 12 then take a few days off and ride the flats of Southern France and have a few more sprint finishes.

Stages 14 and 15 are in the Pyranees and basically will decide who the winner is. Stage 15 covers 127 miles and 6 mountains and has a mountain top finish and looks to be the big stage of the race. So if you're only going to watch one day make sure it's July 17th. After that it's some rolling hills and flat stages then a final individual time trial on the next to last stage.

If you have Tivo, it's perfect for the Tour. Tape the live morning broadcast. On the early stages you basically fast forward through the first 80% of the race and look to see how far away the breakaway is and if there are any crashes. Then start watching it with 20km to the finish.

On the mountain stages I would fast forward on the flats in between mountains. If they are a few mountains on the stage you can skip the first one or two if a big name is not in a breakaway.

The most exciting times of the race are Lance's peformance in the individual time trials and the mountain days. The current for Lance on mountains is that he and his team sit at the front of the pelaton (main group of riders) and set the pace. Then as they go up the mountain you see all the competition crack in their effort to keep up with lance. He just sits their and motors along and you people just crack and hit the wall. When they get about 80% of the way up the mountain if a challenger is still hanging with Lance he will get out of the saddle and really start racing. So over the last 2k or so Lance decides to sprint and leave the guy in emotional and physical ruins.

Lance is riding for Team Discovery this year. Apparently he crashed last week so he will start the tour off with a black eye and some other nasty scrapes.

His main competitors will be
Ivan Basso an Italian riding for CSC Tiscali. Basically his only weakness is that he's not quite as good in the time trials. He can more or less hang with Lance for a majority of the climb up a mountain.

Jan Ulrich former German doper, actually he got banned from the sport for a year b/c he tested positive for ecstasy..which can't help you as an athlete. He is a more powerful rider than Lance. Lance uses the theory of using a lower gear and pedalling as many times as possible. Ulrich chooses to try and muscle his way through. This hurts him at times on mountains because he can't react as quickly to a breakaway. He's a good competitor but he just can't hang on some of the harder mountains.

Of the other threats from the past few years I don't think any are well rounded enough and have a good enough team to beat Lance. If someone is going to beat him it will be Basso, Ulrich, or someone that's young that I'm not that familiar with who hasn't played a prominent part in a Tour yet. Regardless here is a guide to the big guns of the tour.

In other news, starting Saturday I can't go to espn.com or cnn.com until I watch the Tour each day. So I'm going to be a little behind in any breaking sports news. So if the Hawks or Braves trade somebody I'd appreciate an e-mail.

The Future of the Atlanta Hawks

24 Hour Draft Thoughts

I intend to list my thoughts about the draft for the next 24 hours. Unfortunately, we have an Old School Nasty basketball game at 9pm (1.5 hours into the draft or 4 picks) so I will be using Tivo for most of the draft. My current best case scenario for the Hawks would be something like getting Marvin Williams with the 2nd pick, Randolph Morris with the 31st, and then Louis Williams following to our 3rd pick. I don't even know if it's a possiblity that Louis could fall that far but I wouldn't be against taking a flyer on a 1/2 highschool guard from Atlanta. Is it flier or flyer? Salim Stoudamire also would be a decent pickup with the 31st. If we are not going to address needs with our first pick we should do it with our other two picks.

New Recurring Feature

Since this blog is obviously blowing up it's time to have a running gag. After checking out Friendster for awhile I noticed a recurring theme. Girls use the most inexplicable pictures of themselves in their profiles. Which can basically be broken into two categories

1. they find a picture of themselves with a bunch of friends, in which they really like how the look in that picture, so they crop the photo so you just see their face and one of their friend's hands/ears/taint etc. What amazes me is that the picture they ended up with is the best they could do. I mean..if you are going to crop other people out of your picture it better be a damn fine photo of yourself.

2. just a really bad photo. Either they look like a horse or they have on a costume or they are striking some ridiculous pose.

So when I run across these I'm going to post them here. Because making fun of others makes me feel better about myself. And there are plenty of people on Friendster that are willing to make me feel better about myself.

Our first photo comes from a girl who sent me the following message:

Hey! I'm Megan! I know my profile says that I'm in SC, but I'll be visiting ATL in Jul. & will permanently be back in Aug. I'm missing the city & am trying to make good connections now & possibly meet when I return to ATL. I recently saw "Fever Pitch" & thought it was interesting. Anyway, hopefully we'll be able to talk some more.

Now there is one big clarification that Megan here needs to know. I loved Fever Pitch the book by Nick Hornby. I even really enjoyed the British version of the movie starring Colin Firth. However that Jimmy Fallon/Drew Barrymore movie that shared a name with the two previously mentioned works of art, is a completely different monster and it robbed me of several hours of my life (length of the movie and the next few hours I spent ranting on how bad it was).

Anyways without further ado here is Megan's picture and profile



huh? I can't even figure this out. Is the red at the bottom of the picture something she is wearing? What about the red behind her? Is that a bunch of roses or a background in a Wal Mart Glamour Shots section that's supposed to look like a bunch of roses? Needless to say, I will be calling this girl up when she moves back to the ATL. Hopefully she'll give me a rusty trombone.

NBA Draft

shavlikrandolph
Originally uploaded by beefcakejcc.

From the land of the absurd, Shavlik Randolph is apparently staying in the draft. To sum this up for you. I was reading an article yesterday where they listed underclassmen who are testing the Draft waters. When I saw Randolph's name I laughed out loud. He wasn't even one of the three best players on his own team last year. I thought to myself "this is getting ridiculous when everybody declares for the draft". Now today apparently someone has informed him that he will get drafted and would not be better served by actually going back to school, growing some muscle, and possibly playing at a level equal or higher to his competition.

Just so you know this douche avg. 7.4 ppg his freshman year, 7 his soph, and 4.4 pts. and 4.3 rebounds per game as a junior. I honestly and truly hope he doesn't get drafted. In the event that he's entering the draft because his family really needs the money, I offer up two thoughts:

1. The NBDL doesn't pay that much
2. Duke boosters hooked Chris Duhon's mom up with a job and a house, I'm sure they could do the same for your family.

In other news I saw an absolute gem by Smoltz last night. I don't know if they will change it later but right now that article's headline is "Smotlz tosses first shutout in six years". At times the people who run espn.com could not appear to be any more incompetent. Anyways, Smoltz threw a complete game, 5 hit, shutout. The one thing I noticed though is that it's hard to really appreciate a great pitching performance in person. Unless they are waving a bunch of guys the subtleties of pitch placement doesn't really carry over into the stands. However Andruw Jones' absolute bomb of a home run is very easy to appreciate.

R.I.P.

Saint Casey was put to sleep on the afternoon of 6/21/05. He was 14 years old and one hell of a Bichon Frise.

thoughts on Game 5

-there is absolutely no reason for the game to start after 9pm on a Sunday. Golf ended just before 7pm. The game should have started at 8pm.

-I chose to go to sleep at the start of the second half, had a nightmare about getting car jacked and woke up and checked to see if the game was still on, 36 seconds left in regulation.

-Ben Wallace had an all-time bad ass block on the lay-up, followed by Duncan inexplicable decision to tap the rebound instead of dunk it and he ends up missing the shot.

-In overtime the Pistons looked like they were in control. Ben was flying around, Rasheed was hitting shots even Prince got a 3 to drop. Then Big Shot Bob took over. The guy is ridiculous. He made an unbelievable dunk that people usually only dream about, jumps over someone and has absolute complete extension and throws it home and draws the foul. Which then lead to him acting as though he would be unable to shoot the free throw and then just barely getting the shot to the rim. So I figure he comes out of the game and Nazr goes back in for the rest of the game. Nope. He decided to inbound the ball on the final play and get it back for another legendary three. There is no other way to say it. He's the most likable athlete to ever emerge from the hell hole that is bama or spuat (scandal plagued university of alabama tuscaloosa).

-I talked about this before but this series is now decided by the 2-3-2 format. If they stuck to the normal 2-2-1-1-1 format they've been doing, then San Antonio still would have won last night to go up a game, however it would have been at home. So Detroit would return home for a must win game 6 then they would have a chance at the anything goes in Game 7 in Texas.

- What type of odds would it take you at this point to do bet on Detroit to win the series? 10-1? Thus the ratings will only go down for game 6, ABC and NBA has messed up again, and I'm beginning to think they will never learn.

God Bless Will Ferrell

a short tribute to Will Ferrell



Celebrity Jeopardy
Elf clips
Transcript from his Harvard 2003 commencement speech

actually this whole page is stupendous. If you decide to watch the commencement video Will Ferrell is introduced at the 1:30:00 mark.

Great Albums

The new Franz Ferdinand album took me completely by surprise. I'd heard the song Take Me Out about a billion times and liked it, but more or less figured that they were a one trick pony. However I picked up the CD and was pleasantly surprised. It seems like over the past 5 years or so the best music out there was slow/depressing or acoustic music. Other than the White Stripes and the first Strokes album I hadn't bough a new rocking album in a long time. Then this wave of retro (sounds like old new wave rock) music started coming out. The first one I got was Modest Mouse which is a good album but more wierd than rocking. The Zutons album is great but it's all over the place. However this Franz Ferdinand album is pretty much rockin the whole way through. Which is exactly what you need sometimes. You know you in your car and you don't want to just skip to all the fast songs on a cd then put in another cd. You want to just put the cd in and rock out for an 40 minutes to an hour.

Which is why I probably am digging the Kings of Leon album, Aha Shake Heartbreak so much too. The style of music is different but it has the same effect. The KOL are a more throwback of stripped down rock. I've never listened to the Stooges much but it has that late 70's punk rock feel to it. For example I think the song Velvet Snow sounds a lot like Trash by the New York Dolls. So I guess my point is...if you miss that feeling you had in middle school when you were rocking out to Nirvana, Metallica, Pearl Jam etc. and you've had a little too much Wilco, Coldplay etc. check these albums out.

Old School Nasty on the court

Well it's official. The Old School Nasty Fantasy Basketball league will be making their first appearance in a real basketball league. 80% of the league is now on the team.

This also marks the legendary resurrection of my Peachtree Prez Basketball Career. It's been 10 years since I've played in a PPC league and to be completely honest I left at the top of my game. I can only hope that I can dominate now like I did in that Spring League my freshman year of high school.

Of course since then I've devloped a bad back, migraines, sinus problems, about 50-60 lbs, grey hair, and a drinking problem. However, on the plus side I've developed my "post" game and I can now listen to my iPod to get pumped before the game. So I got that going for me..which is nice.

The big question is if anything I've learned coaching a 11-12 boys basketball team at Northside will carry over to this league. I'm guessing it will have taught me how to discipline Connor and Jared. "Jared, you can't throw a basketball at the ref! Go run a lap!"

Music Midtown

Well it's my favorite weekend of the year, Music Midtown. Basically it's like a musical buffet. You have your main courses that you have to eat like Tom Petty and the White Stripes. Some stuff you eat just because it's tradition like the Counting Crows and Def Leppard. Then you have to try some new foods you've never had before like the Killers or Bloc Party. Then you have Tift Merritt for desert. mmmmm.....

Predictions:
Best Show: I'm combining the Sunday night Def Leppard/Kid Rock double header as one show and saying it's going to be kick ass. Any time you have girls dancing in cages on the Lord's day, I'm down.

Best Surprise Show: Interpol

Best Group Sing-a-long show: John Fogerty

For my sleepers I'm going with Biz Markie and Doug E. Fresh. If these guys were playing Friday or Saturday night they'd be easy choices. It's just hard to imagine that I"m gonna wanna listen to old school rap on Sunday afternoon.

Favorite Music Midtown game: 1st person to see a teenager too drunk to stand each day. I'm going with 7:45 on Friday 5:30 on Sat. and 6:30 on Sunday.

Why I love Music Midtown: On Saturday night Tom Petty, Alan Jackson and the Black Eyed Peas will all be playing within a half mile of each other at the same time. I don't see how Alan is going to get much of a draw judging by the usual Midtown crowds.

Also be sure to check out Connor Rand at the Atlanta Brewery from 5:30-7 today. It's just a few miles away from Music Midtown and a great way to start the weekend.

NBA Finals Odds

Line tonight Spurs -6 -300 and o/u 176 under seems like a good bet here
Series: Spurs -260, Pistons +220
specific games: Spurs in 7 16-5, 6 14-5, 5 11-2, 4 9-1, Detroit in 7 15-2, 6 9-1, 5 9-1, 4 35-1

Finals MVP Duncan 7-5, Manu 3-1, Tony 7-1, Rip 8-1, Chauncey 12-1, Sheed 12-1, Tayshaun 15-1, Big Ben 20-1

What'd I'd Bet:
From a pure "best value stand point" I'd put $50 each on Detroit in 7, 6, and 5 games. As long as they don't sweep the Spurs (the can't) you would win more than placing $150 on the Detroit money line. And there is legitimate shot that Detroit could win. None of the bets on the Spurs seem like solid bets. How many games they are going to win it in is an absolute guess. Duncan would be the likely favorite for MVP but at 7-5 you'd have to bet a $1000 to make any money. Winning the series at -260 is the safest bet and as a result you have to put up $260 just to make $100 on an event that is going to take over a week.

So I'm theoretically going with the $50 on Detroit to win the series in teh 7,6,5 games and covering my bases with nightly $50 bets. Game 1 would be under 176 points.

On a much related note. At some point this week I'm going to set up a gambling blog where I bet a standard $50 on different bets ranging from basketball (finals, baseball, golf, tennis etc. Only betting when I feel real confident about something and keeping a running total of what I"m up and down. This seems like a lot better approach than my usual usage of real money on Sportsbook.com and making tons of bets on Thursday/Friday nights when I get home from the bar. I'm going to keep a running total on how I do overall, just line bets, just u/o bets, and just money line bets, and by sport. Hopefully I can figure out some type of system where I'm at my best. It is my destiny to make a lot of money without doing a lot of work. Why not sports gambling?

EDIT:
Since I wrote this it's come to my attention that for some reasons the finals will be played in the 2-3-2 format for some inexplicable reason even though every other series has been 2-2-1-1-1. Does that change anything? Yeah. In my opinion it gives the home team a much better advantage and cuts down on the chances there is a 7 game series. So there's still not much sense in taking the Spurs @ -260 because if you bet $200 you'd only win $76 plus you still have $200 riding on the series despite the fact that anything can happen like say Duncan blowing an ACL. I'd stick to nightly bets. But I still don't see why they would change the format just for the finals. How long has it been since they played a 2-3-2 series in any round?

realignment

First of all I realize I'm about 7 years late with these objections...but who the hell decided baseball's current alignment. Here are a few problems that I have

- The American League has 14 teams with breakdowns of East (5), Central (5), West (4) and the National League has 16 teams with breakdowns of East (5), Central (6), West (5). Brilliant. I can't for the life of me remember why they decided to move the Brewers to the National League

Here is how I would do it

AL East: New York, Boston, Baltimore, Tampa Bay, Toronto
AL Central: Cleveland, Minnesota, Milwaukee, Detroit, Chicago
AL West: Angels, Seattle, Kansas City, Oakland, Texas (big change being KC in West but they already do this in the NFL)

NL East: Atlanta, New York, Philly, Florida, DC
NL Central: Chicago, Cincy, Houston, St.Louis, Pittsburgh
NL West: San Diego, LA, San Francisco, Arizona, Colorado

So every division has five teams which seems fair. I don't know how the owners of the NL Central clubs ok'd their teams to be in a division with 6 teams and let the AL West get away with four. They have to beat out two additional teams to win the division.

The only beef I have with my alignment is that I don't see a logical way to place Philly and Pittsburgh in the same division. It seems like intrastate rivalry would help interest. Dodgers and Giants seem to have a pretty good rivalry although I don't think either team is that heated with the Padres. The only way to do it would be to move Atl over to the Central, which would be their third division and completely kill any type of rivalry we've ever generated.

Anybody remember why the Brewers were switched to the NL?

Anime Mark Jackson

I don't even know what to make of this..

also as a special favor to Hot Tub Johnny here is a link to the Charleston SC Wedding and Event Planner company he works for. Is there nothing more annoying than website that have music automatically play when you visit the site. However I imagine most people planning a wedding thinks it's elegant.

adult links

a list of links that The Intern cannot link to because of adult content. It's safe to say that these should not be viewed at work.

http://www3.sympatico.ca/tidybytes/Flash/Thetest.swf

Goals

I've decided two things in the last 24 hours. And I'm dead set on accomplishing them. At least for the next week or so. Then I will think of something different.

-I want to perfect my knuckleball. Basically this and golf are my only two chances at still being a professional athlete. So here's the deal. I'm going to work on it incessantly for the next two years. Try out for a semi-pro league. Dominate the league. Get invited to Spring tryouts with a MLB team and then the rest is history. Chances of accomplishing this task: 90%

-I decided on my way to Arby's for lunch that before I die I'm going to join either a Rotary Club or the Freemasons. From what I understand the Shriners are tools. My dad's father was in a Rotary Club and it always seemed like fun. About once a month they get together for lunch and have a speaker. You make lot's of connection and sit around and talk about sports, fishing, etc.. My grandfather on my mother's side was a freemason so apparently I could join. I'm hoping that it's basically like the Stonecutter's society that Homer joined on the Simpsons. Of course I will never be able to do this or enjoy it because of my fear of talking to strangers. Chances of accomplishing this task: 15%

growing bookmarks list

pages that I need to check regularly when I'm bored but don't want to put on my bookmarks list

Barkley Quotes
Fred Toucher's Blog
Untitled Rich Levine Blog
Braves News
Gorilla Mask's Daily Links
Mac News
Bruce Feldman's College Football Blog
Defamer
Tucker Max
Maddox
Drudge Report
Zap2it TV and Movie News
Get Fuzzy
Pearls Before Swine
Bomani Jones' Blog: bad ass freelance writer for ESPN.com among others
The Corporate Headquarters of the San Antonio Gunslingers
Sexy Results: UVA blog among other things
EveryDayShouldBeSaturday: Gators and CFB
Georgia Sports Blog: All the UGA you can handle
Straight Bangin': Michigan football and the NBA
The Drizzle: ATL sports and UGA